No Friends at the Poker Table: The Abby Merk & Susan Controversy

How Susan Caused Abby Emotional Damage

It all started with a controversial situation on the Lodge Live Stream.

The spot pre-flop unfolded as follows:

• CO, Virginia Mouse with $1,6K in stack made 3-Bet to $150 with A8o
• UTG, Susan with $1,5K in stack called with 66
• HJ, Abby Merk with $824 in stack decided to go all-in with A5s

Virginia thought for a moment and mucked her hand. 

Susan, however, didn’t do that; instead, she asked Abby, “You want action?”, Abby replied, “Not really,” and started laughing nervously.

Susan drew her own conclusions from this and, after a brief moment, ultimately called the all-in.

Abby was visibly upset by this and told Susan:

Susan apologized but that didn’t loosen the tension — Abby was already tilted and answered irritatedly:

In the end, Abby lost on both boards and, looking very displeased, decided to make the minimum possible rebuy — $60.

The poker community was largely taken aback by Abby’s behavior in this spot, unable to fathom the reasons behind it. Some speculated that Merk was already on tilt before the all-in, others that she felt a sense of entitlement or that she had misread her opponents and the situation as a whole — leading to frustration that she directed outward.

Abby’s Explanation Worsen the Situation

Abby herself later explained what happened via Instagram as follows:

“Susan and I have played together for a long time now and have had many friendly conversations at the table. But more than that I thought we were friends, or at least closer friends than she may have thought.

But anyway we play this hand where I raise A5 of diamonds, Virginia 3-bets me, and then Susan calls. And now while I’ll be the first to admit I don’t know that much about poker strategy I do know that 4-bet bluffing with A5 suited would look pretty cool.

So, I go all-in for $800, hoping both of my opponents fold. When Virginia folds I’m relieved cause now Susan is the only one left. 

But then after thinking for a while she asks me: “I have a few questions.” — and at this point my face shifts from “try hard” to “friendly”. Then she asks: “You want action?”.

And now again, at this point I’m thinking in FRIEND mode and feel like she’s asking me transparently what I would like her to do — meaning if I say “no” she would fold, and if I say “yes” she would call.

Of course this sounds a bit ridiculous in a competitive context but this is very common between friends in a friendly game. So, I tell Susan transparently: “Not really” — thinking she would fold but instead she calls!

Now it’s clear to me that I have completely misjudged the situation. I was not happy about it but let me make this clear: I don’t think there was technically anything wrong with what Susan did. We decide to run it twice and I can’t improve on either run out which basically just means lowkey Susan owned my ass today. 

At the moment, I’ll be honest I was tilted. I’m a human being with emotions about the hand but we’re also on a live stream where the nit game is on and we’ve already had one person leave on this live stream without paying his nit tax.

So, because I don’t wanna risk a lot of money in this state of mind, I rebuy for $60 and get very lucky later on such that instead of being down piles on the session I actually finished the day down like $50 or something like that.

However, that was less important to me than settling this situation with Susan. So, when the cameras were off immediately after the stream Susan and I talked privately and resolved this entire thing. We both made it clear that there are no hard feelings between us at all, cause after all, THAT’S POKER, PHIL!!!”

While the explanations seemed quite plausible to some players, including Xuan Liu perceived Abby as “too innocent for poker”, others were deeply outraged with the moment where Merk stated that it is actually a common practice for friends to collude during “a friendly game”.

Marle Spragg described Abby’s approach to what happened powerfully:

And since it was her comment that received significant support from the community, we decided to focus on its essence.

Why You Can’t and Shouldn’t Expect Soft Play From a “Friend”

Poker is not merely a competition. Your earnings literally depend on how effectively you exploit your opponents. The fundamentals of the game scream that collusion is detrimental — even in the form of “soft play” — because if everyone plays that way against one another, the game would cease to be profitable for anyone.

Moreover, in public arenas — such as a broadcast poker game — this kind of behavior undermines the integrity and reputation of the sport. Imagine a newcomer tuning into the stream featuring Abby and Susan, curious about a potential career in poker, only to witness not just the content creator’s emotional outburst but also her explanation that when friends play together, it is considered normal for them to go easy on one another.

“Soft play” among friends makes poker less appealing for newcomers because it undermines fairness and player equality. Furthermore, given the “clarifications” from Abby that now circulate online, some potential players might never even try the game, fearing that groups of friends playing together could be colluding with zero chance for them as a newbies to succeed against them.

Why Poker Players Should Follow Susan’s Example

Setting aside the issue of potential soft play on Abby’s part, Susan herself delivered a masterclass during the stream on how to read an opponent and use that to her advantage.

The stream shows her watching Abby closely; knowing her well, she sensed a weakness. A single question regarding the action — and the answer she received — made Susan realize that her 66 stood a very good chance against Abby, so she decided to try and capitalize on that.

Even after that, she displayed true class at the table, refusing to let Abby’s tilt infect her or make her feel guilty for making the right decision.

As if that weren’t enough, Susan also commented on the situation after the fact, emphasizing that she prioritized the integrity of the game over friendly interaction at the table.

What conclusion can we draw from all of this?

Be like Susan — draw a line between friendliness and fair play, and don’t let someone else’s tilt guilt-trip you in emotionally charged spots where you made the right move.