Roll Call: PL.com Enters a Brave New World

It's that time of year again! With the madness of the WSOP out of the way PokerListings.com is set to hit the tournament trail with everything we've got. The EPT, the WPT, The World Series of Poker Circuit and every major stand-alone tournament worldwide will soon fall victim to the utter pwnage that is PokerListings.com.

Thrice nominated for the Montgomery Burns Award for Outstanding Achievement in the Field of Excellence , the PL.com tournament reporting team takes no prisoners and will stop at nothing short of world poker tournament domination!

Everyone wants a piece of PL.com!

Headed up by yours truly, Matt Showell, and the poker-reporting super computer also known as Owen Laukkanen, the team has undergone a few changes as two new members have finally finished the rigorous training program needed to become a PL.com tournament reporter.

Segregated from the rest of the population at birth, only those few infants that show genius-level intelligence and a propensity for gambling, usually evidenced by prop betting with other babies in the maternity ward, are given the opportunity to one day don the coveted black PL.com dress shirt.

Our Father, who art in Vegas.

Math is taught with poker chips and Geography with the stops on the tournament trail. The Super/System is our bible and to Doyle Brunson we pray.

Of the literally hundreds of potentials we've been training at the super-secret PokerListings.com facility deep in the Canadian wilderness only two have survived to reach adulthood.

Aloha!!!1

Arthur Crowson, aka the Mad Hawaiian, earned his stripes back in 2006 when he was first sent into battle at the World Series of Poker. Proving himself worthy of flying the PL.com colors Arthur received the PokerListings Medal for Distinguished Service when he took down the first interview with Jamie Gold days before he would be crowned champion.

Honing his skills at the 2007 WSOP, the Hawaiian Haymaker is now being let loose on an unsuspecting population of regular-season PL.com readers. The upcoming World Series of Poker Europe will be his first conquest, where he'll be tag-teaming the coverage with the venerable sage Owen Laukkanen. Think Double Impact sans Jean-Claude Van Damme.

Lois Lame

Rounding out our tournament-reporting dream team is the incomparable Erin Warner. T-Bone to those who know her well, Erin got her chops breaking stories wide open for the news division of PokerListings.com.

Attaining super-stardom at a young age when she took down the much sought after Ms. Teen Omaha Hi-Lo pageant, Warner got her first taste of casino life this summer in Las Vegas where she ran reconnaissance missions for the PL.com news section, relaying precious poker intel back to home base.

Kind of a big deal.

Leading the conquest of live tournament reporting are two self-proclaimed poker icons. Matt Showell, aka Weapon X from Canada, has made up one half of the PL.com dynamic duo for the last year and admits to carrying the team for the entire time.

Voted most likely to anchor a local television news show, Matt likes his chicken spicy and enjoys referring to himself in the third person.

Owen Laukkanen, aka the Abominable O-Man, has been striking fear into the hearts of infidels since the 2006 WSOP and was recognized by the ever-authoritative ThePokerBiz.com for his groundbreaking coverage of the 2007 Irish Poker Open.

Not only the founder.

Cialis spokesperson and founding member of the Luke Perry Fan Club, O-Dogg continues to astound the competition with his Herculean stamina and vast array of sport coats.

With the Miyagi-esque tutelage provided by The Owen and The Showell, Arthur and Erin will soon blossom into full-fledged tournament reporters with all the glitz and glamour that goes with it. Private jets, penthouse suites and a steady supply of exotic supermodels are just a few of the perks of working for the most ballingest crew in the history of the universe.

Now that we're all friends, let's examine the PL.com master-plan for the year to come.

Room with a view.

The World Poker Tour has been PokerListings.com's stomping grounds since the beginning of the fifth season and this year we will continue to pwn regardless of any and all efforts to stop us. Neither rain nor sleet nor an exclusive deal that sells out the objectivity of journalism in poker will stop us from doing our sworn duties. So if it's unbiased, well written and interesting coverage of the WPT you're interested in look no further than PokerListings.com.

The World Series of Poker Circuit is also on our hit-list and a representative from PL.com will be on hand at each and every stop. From Iowa to Indiana we'll be bringing you the stories of small-town poker heroes going up against the biggest names in the business and once in a while managing to emerge victorious.

Monte Carlo.

Even Europe is not safe from the long arm of PokerListings.com. We'll be crossing the pond repeatedly to hit up all the stops on the EPT , starting in Barcelona and wrapping up with the Grand Final in Monte Carlo.

The EPT continues to bring the most elite players in the world together to compete in the kind of sophisticated atmosphere only Europe can offer. Jackets required!

Lastly, intermingled among these, are the world's biggest and best stand-alone events. The Aussie Millions, the Caribbean Poker Classic, the PartyPoker Million Cruise VI, the Irish Poker Open, the NBC Heads-Up Championship, the United States Poker Championship and many more will all be available to you right here on PokerListings.com, just a mouse-click away.

Down by da beach!

So whether it's flying to Club Med in the Turks and Caicos or braving the trans-oceanic journey to take a cruise through the Mediterranean Sea, the PL.com team will be there. We know how much our comprehensive coverage means to you and if we have to make these kinds of sacrifices to get it, so be it. Lock and load and hit the road!