Christmas is here - time to break out the eggnog, shortbread, turkey, ham, knit sweaters, wrapping paper, plenty of mulled wine to take the edge off the in-laws and of course, the classic Christmas carols.

If you're reading this on Christmas Eve, I think it's safe to assume that you're as obsessed with poker as I am. For all you wonderfully obsessed poker people, I've decided to remix the classic Christmas carols, poker style.

So when your family's having the traditional sing-along, you can join in, adding some bluffs, bad beats and big pots into the mix.

Just to keep it fun, try and guess the song by the name before reading my stanza. The first one's a little tricky.

5) Jingle Tells

Jingle tells, jingle tells
Give your hand away.
Oh what fun it is to raise
When I know what cards you play, hey!

Lacy Jones is actually singing "Jingle Tells" in this picture.

4) Peel Off a Red Card River

Peel off a red card river (river)
No spade or club, not one of those
'Cause if you hit the flush draw (flush draw)
I'm gonna pay out through the nose

3) Stop and Go, Stop and Go, Stop and Go

Well the level of the play is frightful
But felting you is so delightful
So this time the flop I'll play slow
Stop and go, stop and go, stop and go

2) O Fold for Me

O fold for me
O fold for me
I'm bluffing, and I have nothing

Be warned: those who don't sing along to poker carols get coal.

O fold for me
O fold for me
Just curse your luck, and then hit the muck

1) All the Draws Are Runnin' Me Down

Oh! You better not call
We don't need to start
I know what will fall
It's your flush with a heart
All the draws are runnin' me down

There you have it. I'll admit that "O fold for me" wasn't the greatest piece of poetry I've written, but figure "All the draws are runnin' me down" more than makes up for it. I just hope to one day hear the Boss singing my lyrics; they could call the show E Street on Fifth Street!

Merry Christmas readers, and be responsible: don't drink and donk.

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