More specifically, the song "heads-up. What can I say? I like action and I like it raw.
Call me crazy and yes, hyperaggressive, but I really like to overplay my hands and deceive my opponents. My style's sexy and empowering and never duplicated, although it may be imitated.
At some points I have been outmatched; at others, I was half asleep. Hell, I even loved playing the $5 sit-and-gos heads-up ... as long as it was heads-up and as long as I was being notably challenged and of course, walking away with a grin, win or lose.
If I'm running bad, I usually play 24-hour sessions, walk away dead even and call it a night. Booking the win isn't in the nature of my play all the time. Yes, I admit it, I can be masochist and quite sadistic. Who would create the nickname of "Jennicide" for themselves at age 12, if they weren't?
I play cards, I design, I write, I think, and I love theoretical elements, without ever forgetting my roots and my tendency to be seduced by underground subcultures.
My heads-up play is where I find my strengths. The victory in a multi-table tournament isn't as victorious for me. So that's never been my focus.
Sure, when I get in the position to win and play heads-up ... I might win, but chip advantages, limited breaks and having too much fun with the people on the rail and sometimes crapshoot structures, I get incredibly pissed.
Yep, I have fun when I play and yelling out profanities such as "Chooooo," "SFB," "Shoes," probably isn't the best final-table strategy, but I'll never care. It's just a game, in the end.
The "Chooooo" thing is of course Jimmy Choo, as I love his shoes. The other joke was after I'd score a sufficient MTT cash, still being in college, I'd buy a pair of awesome shoes.
The trophies for me are simply the memories, the experiences, and the never-ending fable-like stories that I walk away with, which not many will understand, ever.
I've also been exposed to the crème de la crème of degenerates, and yes, I admit, they "do their thing." I just do mine, and sometimes end up getting lost in my inner battles.
The beauty of my play is that I am a modernized chameleon. I can't even graduate from a college because growing up I wanted a degree in everything. Having to decide on a specific course of "studies" always terrified me.
I would often pose the question, should I focus my energy on mathematics, arts, science or expert cooking, sewing, and sportsmanship?
Well, I prefer the combination. Believe it or not, besides my obvious gaming and computer background, I played sports, did the competitive horseback-riding thing, was a dancer (ballet, tap, jazz), a musician, an ice-skater (my parents introduced me to it because they were friends with gold medalists), excelled in most of my creative writing and art classes ... and I really love performing.
I also play the clarinet and piano, and have a slight knowledge of how to play a guitar, although I practiced bass most of the time. Most of my friends growing up were artists.
As to sports, softball was my game for a while, as well as basketball, and yes, I even had private instruction in golf and tennis, though as soon as I suffered injuries or felt I had a sufficient handle on the activity, I'd move on to the next.
I usually hold a lot of this stuff back because it's hard to look back and know that you were a lot more diverse than you ever thought. My parents and childhood friends reminded me of who I really am, even though sometimes I forget.
Going through picture albums and seeing yourself develop from one stage to another is quite revealing. I never grow up!
Another primary pitfall with my interests was my lack of ability to focus on just one of the activities I liked. I never had enough time in the day to do everything, so at times, I folded or covered my anger at my quitting activities with a pretentious "dislike" for the subject.
The funniest is telling people I can't swim, when I played a lot of water games growing up and spent my summers at our beach home. Maybe I just don't feel like swimming or I'm too lazy to physically exert myself at the time.
Saying that I "just don't know how," has been the easiest excuse for me in everything to date, but unfortunately the ignorance card is being played against me, as my parents remind me that I do know how to do it.
Fortunately, my health is much better, as I am accustomed to being "ill" all the time with infection or physical disorders, which incapacitated me from moving on quickly. My writers' block is even going away as I am focusing on positive elements in and moving past the "wanting to balance."
Instead, I've found the balance in my life. In my opinion and in my own studies, since frankly, I barely attended classes in college at all and spent most of my time in high school in detention and cutting class, I feel that there is no primary difference between specializations.
Regardless of your specialty and interests, who ever made the decision to say you can't do it all, have it all, or at least see it all?
Well, I can be stubborn and immature and I can't tell you if that will ever change. In any event, I don't like it, and I prefer to live how I like, how I want and never be told I have to conform to certain rules. I like it dirty, sexy and the beats only make us stronger, as they are more revealing than the wins.
For a cool little update and insight, check out IGN: Vault Network - I just finished up an interview with them and it will be up within a week or so!
It promises to be a huge feature and was certainly fun for me. I've been a role-playing gamer since I was three, and if you're a gamer, IGN is the leading community to get the latest scoop on everything.
I'm also fixing my desire to design by launching my own clothing line, Jayel Brand. The reason I call it "Jayel" is that was my nickname my Grandpa gave me growing up.
--Jennifer "Jennicide" Leigh
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